A good question everyone has of course is, “Aren’t I right and justified in being angry when it’s so clear that something terrible has been done?” I know the problem and I know the answer. Unfortunately for students of A Course in Miracles, a statement occurs twice that says, “The anger that we feel is never justified.” It never says we should not be angry or that it’s a sin to be angry; it simply says that when you do get angry, don’t try to justify it. And the reason for that is all anger, regardless of the form of the abuse or the sin or the problem, all anger is a statement that says, “Because of what you’ve done, I am not peaceful. Because of what you’ve done, hundreds and millions of people are not peaceful.” That’s a lie. William Blake said long ago, “Don’t believe the lie.” Everything in this world is a lie. There’s a line in the Course that says, “Nothing so blinding as perception of form.” You should not believe anyone who comes from the position that the world is real, bodies are real and bad things happen to bodies. If someone says that to you, don’t listen to them because they are labeling under a psychotic delusion and are hallucinating in thinking that there’s a world out there in which people get hurt. There is no world out there.
It will be like this: if I had a dream tonight about you, and I saw you the next day, and in that dream I had about you last night, you do something really unconscionable to me, you abuse me, attack me terrible, and I come see you the next day and yell at you for what you did to me last night, you would lock me up. You would wonder if I had taken my medication this morning, because you say, “I don’t know what you’re talking about!” Well that’s what happens when we get angry. We are blaming other people for the dis-ease that we feel. This doesn’t mean that other people aren’t coming from their Egos, it’s simply saying, “What do other Egos have to do with me?” What do other Egos have to do with me? No matter what they’ve done, they are not responsible for my not feeling the Love and the Peace of God. That is always the bottom line. That’s why anger is never justified.
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You may attack my Body but you cannot attack my Mind. There’s a line in the Course that’s a rhetorical question that says, “Are thoughts dangerous?” And then the answer is, “To bodies, yes.” But I’m not a Body. You’re not a Body. There is no world in which bodies interact. That’s part of the hallucination. There’s a line that says, “What if you knew this world was an hallucination?” Well, it would terrify us, because if the world was an hallucination, as it is, then I don’t exist. I’m not here! I can only be here as a Body living in a world into which I believe I was born – a world that existed before I was born, a world that existed while I’m here, and a world that will exist after I die. But all that is made up; it’s just a bad dream. A gigantic dream, but it is still a dream.
So the question is, “Who am I angry at?” And who is the “I” that is getting angry? I want to get angry at you. That’s why anger is such a problem. Psychologists are very wrong – and I can speak of that since I’m a psychologist – psychologists are very wrong when they say that anger is a basic human emotion. It’s not a basic human emotion. There are no basic human emotions. There are no human emotions. There’s only one emotion in the Mind, if you want to call it emotion, and that would be Fear. Everything in this world is a projection and a split off part of that Fear. But anger is not a basic human emotion; anger is a wish, a wish that says, “I want to be unfairly treated by you, so I can be justified in being angry and point an accusing finger at you – and say – in the words of the Course, “Behold me Brother, in your hands I die.” Or in your hands I suffer. And I need people to attack so that then God will find them out and discover them to be the sinner and not me. A fundamental principle of the Ego thought system is one or the other. In fact, that’s how the Ego thought system began – it was God or the Ego. It was a capital S Self of perfect Oneness or a little s self of individuality, separation, and specialness and uniqueness. It’s one or the other; both can’t co-exist.
And so, if the Ego is to survive, it has to believe that it destroyed God. And of course then, that’s what the Course would call original sin except it’s a sin that never happened, it’s just a sin that we believe happened . But since that’s what made the Ego, and the Ego is our father, the Ego is our source, then everything we do revolves around that “one or the other” mentality. I don’t care about you; I just care that my needs are met. And if it’s one or the other, there can only be one sinner, and I want to be sure that it’s you and not me. So I want you to hurt me, I want you to do unkind things, that’s the key thing in this Course that makes it so unique as a Spirituality – it exposes the darkest depths of the Ego thought system that has the thought, “I want you to do bad things.” Because then I can say to God, “Here’s the sinner.” And there’s a line in the Course, actually it’s the same section that “Behold me Brother, in your hands I die” comes in; it says, “Your brother’s sins are writ in Heaven – and go before him. I want you to sin against me, so God in his Heaven will see your sins and they will go before you and he will lead you to Hell. If it’s one or the other, if you go to Hell, I must go to Heaven. And what is it that establishes you as a sinner? My suffering. In fact, the title of that section is “The Picture of Crucifixion,” which is not a reference to the Biblical myth, it has nothing to do with the Biblical story. We all show this picture of Crucifixion to each other; look how you’ve hurt me. That’s why people love to hold onto their child abuse stories and will never let them go. And they’re willing to pay therapists thousands upon thousands upon thousands of dollars to reinforce the fact that something terrible happened to them. Now indeed, something terrible happened to their bodies, and I’m not justifying people’s pedophilia or people’s child abuse, but I’m simply saying, “That’s not the cause of my distress now.” It’s understandable, as a child, I would be greatly distressed over sexual abuse, physical abuse, emotional abuse, but I’m not that child anymore.
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From the Right Mind of Spiritual Director of Enlightenment Village, iKE ALLEN.
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